Put your carts away!!!! You retards!!!

Jeez, 3 whole blog posts without any bitching going on. I must rectify.

So first off, when you go to a store and you take your shopping cart with you to load your items into your car, PUT IT AWAY!!! Walk that whopping 10 yards to the cart return corral and get the fucking thing out of my way! You lazy fuck!

There's nothing worse than approaching what looks like a great parking spot only to find that there's a cart right in the middle of it.

Now, I understand if you have small children that you may not be able to leave your car even for an instant. (shit, I'm lying...I don't believe that for a second. It takes no time at all...if your kid is buckled in, what the fuck is he going to do in the time that it takes for you to be less of a douche-nozzle?)

However, the vast majority of the shopping carts found parked on the lines between parking spaces are left there by total toolboxes that should die in a fire. In fact...die TWICE in a fire. ALMOST die once, go to the burn clinic for some painful skin grafts from your butt to your face, endure months of physical therapy and people calling you "ass-face", then go to a bar, do a flaming shot, catch your head on fire and die from brain fry for real.

So, people with small kids get a reluctant pass on this issue, but all you other lazy motherfuckers: put 'em back!!! No excuses, no exceptions...DO IT!!!

Snow on the ground? Fuck you, put it back...

It's raining? Fuck you, put it back...

Really really hot outside? Fuck you, put it back...

In a big hurry? Fuck you, put it back...

All this doesn't even address the possible damage stray carts can do to cars. I personally don't give enough of a crap about my car to worry about little dings but I always think about that poor sap with a Porsche that has a dent in his door because a cart hit it. I saw a little kid take his empty cart and with a running start, launch it across a lane or two to the edge of the parking lot but he missed and hit a nice SUV. He went over and grabbed it and moved it and then just walked off. You may say "well, that was just a kid", but he was with his mother who saw the whole thing and didn't say a word!! What the hell is up with that??

In conclusion, I'll borrow a phrase from maddox.xmission: If you disagree with me, it's because you're wrong.